Keeping yourself safe and stopping yourself from self harming
Reason with yourself -
When you don't feel like self harming write a list of reasons to avoid it in the future.
So that if you feel like self harming later you can look at the list.
It may include:
I've managed not to self harm for 3 weeks, I don't want to start again now
Once I start it's difficult to stop
I don't want to end up in hospital
Self-harm affects my relationships
It doesn't help me in the long run
Write down why you do not deserve to be hurt
Make yourself safe -
Try to identify what triggers the want to self-harm
Prepare for these and avoid them
Avoid things which you could use to self harm
Stay with people
Get weekly prescriptions from your GP, so you can't stock medication up
Reward yourself for not self harming -
Keep a progress chart of days, for each day you haven't self harmed put a smiley face
Delaying self harm-
Lock things away which cold be used for self harm, when you try to get it, it will take longer and give you time to think
Phone a helpline, Samaritans for example. Get someone to ring you in a hour and promise yourself you will not self-harm in that hour
Delay self harming for 10, 15, 20 minutes. Setting these limits gives you time to think again and the feeling may pass
Mediation
Going for a run
Deep breathing
Relaxation music
Mindfullness - remember a safe place, a happy memory, picture it, remember how you felt, what you could see, hear, taste and smell.
Pick up a small object, close your eyes. What does it feel like, how heavy is it, what shape is it, how does it smell, what use does it have?
Create an affirmation. A phrase or sentence you say to yourself which is something good about you or something you want to achieve. Then repeat it to yourself.
I am a good person
I can achieve what I want to achieve
People care about me and I try to care about myself
I do not deserve to be hurt
Ask yourself why -
Why do I want to hurt myself?
How am I feeling now?
How will I feel later if I do self harm?
Is there anything else which will ease this feeling instead of self harming?
Have I done something else other than self harm when I've felt a similar feeling?
How does self harming make me feel?
Why do you want to stop self harming?
Sometimes that inner voice inside ourselves says critical and hurtful things - when you hear these negative thoughts think "STOP" and picture a red stop sign.
Take a 5 deep breaths
Then observe how you're feel and what you're thinking
Think about the situation from another person's perspective, what advice they would give or you would give to them
Tell yourself a positive phrase about yourself over and over again
Pratice this and see what is the most helpful phrase or advice to yourself
Express your feeling physically -
Scream as loud as you can
Hit a cushion
Kit a ball against a wall
Squeeze a stress ball
Sing
Tear up a newspaper
Play loud music and dance
Do physical exercise
Throw ice in a bath to smash it
Make play doh models and then smash them up
Pop bubble wrap
Things that look like self harm -
Squeeze ice, putting red dye in ice and melting it in your hand
Draw where you want to cut yourself in red pen or fake blood
Biting into a chilli
Dying your hair with temporary red dye and washing your hair to see the red wash away
Putting candle wax on your skin and peeling it off
Peeling off a face mask
Trying to work out how you feel -
Ask yourself - Do I feel angry? What about?...
Write down emotions and look at them when you want to identify how you feel
Write a letter to someone you're angry with, but don't send it
Write a list of your achievements
Make a list of what you are thankful for
Make a wish list
Talking about self harm -
Write a diary
Call a friend or helpline
Comfort yourself -
Have a bath
Stay in bed
Use nice scented oils
Make a 'happy box'
Massage your hands/feet
Cuddle a toy or pet
Hug yourself
Meditate
Listen to music
Use distractions - from previous blog post