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How to handle confrontation

Confrontation is when a disagreement between people creates an argumentative situation because they do not agree on something.

These situations are often hostile and can become aggressive if not dealt with sensibly.

The people involved can feel attacked and become defensive, or not get their point across, which causes frustration.

Emotions can run high during a confrontation, these include: anger, frustration and guilt.

Confrontation isn't always bad:

  • It can resolve things you felt were a problem

  • Relieve anger and frustration

  • Change the situation for the better

  • Improve relationships

  • Help other people see things from a different point of view

  • Standing up for yourself can give you confidence too

Responding to confrontation:

  • Stay calm

  • If they shout, don't shout back

  • If it's too heated walk away and continue at another time

  • Explain to them that you would both not be able to effectively get your points across when emotions are so high

  • Listen to the other person

  • State your point factually

  • Don't just vent your frustration

  • Know what you want to come from the confrontation - solution

  • Move to a goal, what would you like to happen in the future

It's not about blame, it's about finding a resolution

Tips:

  • Know the facts

  • Think positive, think conversation not argument

  • Take a deep breath

  • Breathe slower - lowers your heatbeat and adrenaline

  • Explain what you want out of the conversation, be prepared to compromise

  • What triggers your anger - prepare a new response to the trigger

  • Let the person know they are being confrontational - "why are you being so agrressive?", "why are you shouting?"

  • Don't get sucked into an argument

Useful links:

  • The Iceberg Theory of Confrontation: 90 percent of a confrontation takes place below our rational awareness -

http://westsidetoastmasters.com/article_reference/how_to_handle_confrontation.html

  • 8 bulletproof ways to help confrontations work for you and the person you're dealing with -http://www.uncommonhelp.me/articles/fear-of-confrontation/

  • Confrontation for sissies - http://www.oprah.com/spirit/How-to-Take-the-Fight-Out-of-Confrontation

  • Steven Aitchison's 7 tips for dealing with confrontation -http://www.stevenaitchison.co.uk/blog/7-tips-for-dealing-with-confrontation/

  • EHow - how to handle confrontation -

  • http://www.ehow.co.uk/how_2204451_handle-confrontation.html

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